Goin' Crackers

I just had a long, thoughtful conversation with J regarding the relative merits of various kinds of crackers. And because I am a caring and considerate altruist, I will now share the outcome of that deeply philosophical discussion.

Triscuits:
Consensus reached. Not a cracker at all. Shredded Wheat masquerading as a cracker. Not good for dipping. Flavor is too strong (and nasty, imnsho) and overpowers whatever you pair it with.

Wheat Thins:
No consensus reached.

• I feel they are a good snack cracker with a nice flavor, but they are bad for dipping, because they are too small and too flimsy. They cannot hold any substantial weight and certainly not enough weight to support the amount of dip I like to heap upon a cracker.
• J supports Wheat Thins in any role and will choose them no matter what dip, topping, crudités, or whatnot may be planned for the pairing.

Saltines:
No consensus reached. It got ugly, in fact. I may or may not have pulled over to the side of road and attempted to order him out of the car, then refused to drive on until he admitted that my assessment was correct and that there were no takebacks. Maturity is overrated.

• I maintain that saltines are your basic, run-of-the-mill, average, ordinary cracker. It pairs well with its cheese equivalent of your basic block of medium cheddar. And to make it perfection, add some sweet gherkins. In fact, I had this combo for dinner.
• J rudely and arrogantly maligns the saltine and claims it is sub-par and far below the level of all other crackers. He claims that he *might* be able to accept them with peanut butter. Whatever.

Ok, so we didn't get very far. The conversation devolved pretty quickly once we hit the saltines impasse. Rest assured, though, that I will be sure to post results as they develop in any further cracker conversations. It's important that you have all the valuable decision-making tools at your disposal in time for your next snacking opportunity. See? I am such an altruist.